I NEEDED THIS

via (date of post tied to this pic is my birthday; didn't know this when I saw it just knew I loved it)

I had just become frustrated from arguing with my daughter about her hair when I threw my hands up in surrender and returned to my bedroom. As I closed the door, I continued to fuss to myself about her stubbornness while, simultaneously, telling myself that I needed to let it go -although I'm right and know what's best, and blah, blah, blah. This went on for a few seconds until these words stopped me in my tracks:

Do all things without murmurings and disputings: That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world; Holding forth the word of life; that I may rejoice in the day of Christ, that I have not run in vain, neither laboured in vain. Philippians 2:14-16 KJV   

I had just clicked the link to BibleGateway and was immediately convicted by the first line from their Verse of the Day. This conviction was not just about the argument with my daughter, but about my tendency to fuss in general. I am a fusser. I do a lot of back and forth with the kids and the husband when they don't do what I think they should, when I think they should, or how I think they should. Don't get me wrong, I don't go around nagging and screaming all day, but if I'm honest I do it way more than I should. I used to think it was everyone else but over the years I've slowly (and painfully) come to realize that it's mostly me. You would think at my age I'd be in a place where I'm not so easily roused but, I'm just not there yet. Why is it I can't be more gracious towards others when God is always so gracious towards me? The Bible says that we are to be merciful so that we may have mercy and be gracious so that we may obtain grace but that's hard to remember when I'm picking up behind everyone after I've cleaned the kitchen and cooked a huge meal. I suppose this is why God commands us to study the Word. He knows we will need its instructions to help pull us back from the brink when things start to bubble over. Clearly, I don't have these instructions down pat, but I really need to make a more concerted effort to study the Word daily. Although I know I'm too old to completely change and too human to be perfect, I won't stop striving for either.